About a year ago, for health reasons, I gave up drinking wine or any alcohol for that matter but it was wine that was my favourite. Getting out the glass, pouring a wine, had become as a little ritual, a signal that the working day had finished,that it was now time to relax, think about dinner, listen to music, sit and enjoy early evening. I’d have another glass with dinner.Two glasses of wine a day had been my habit for a long long time so I expected not having it to be hard but to my surprise it wasn’t.
Now its the time of parties and social occasions and this is where I notice the difference. I don’t mean I’ve been tempted, I haven’t. I can’t claim any special virtue about this, it’s just become normal to say no thanks. But I’ve noticed that while sme take it in their stride, others get a little anxious because they haven’t got something like orange juice or non-alcohol drinks to offer. Or because they feel I’m not enjoying myself –how can I enjoy myself when I only drink water?
On Sunday I went to a party and a lovely woman got me a glass of water, then another, and she didn’t think it was odd, or make any comment, just smiled and kept me filled up when I needed it. I hadn’t realised until then how I’d been preparing myself for the anxieties of other people around this question.
I have alway relied on the kindness of strangers is Blanche Du Bois’ great line from Streetcar Named Desire by Tennessee Williams. Great title that. And to think he was going to call it The Poker Game? Shows how important titles are, doesn’t it.
I have always picked up on the anxieties of strangers. And friends. Should I cut that out like I cut out alcohol? Nah. Part of life isn’t it? Picking up on the love, the kindness, the anxiety of friends and strangers is what we’re about isn’t it? Especially at this time of the year.
So whether its water or wine here’s a toast to an enjoyable pre-Christmas time and may all your anxieties be quickly smoothed out and leavened with lots of kindnesses. Here’s to us…
